His warm body embraced me. I could feel the heat from his trembling body. Slowly he stroked the string of hair near my right ear and faintly whispered my name with such a force. He tried to fasten his hold but it all seemed weak. I hold tight to his nape and refused to let him go. Creeping, my left hand travelled to his chest and felt the slow rhythm of his body. His heart thumped simultaneously with not much enthusiasm. Warm tears pelted on his body and he moved a little bit to give me more space. My heart swollen when I knew it was time for me to let go. I clenched his white shirt but he was stronger than me. He knew death was definite and will surely visit every living thing. He rolled himself away but my hand hooked him. He smiled faintly and his hard icy cold lips pressed hard on my lips. It was as sweet as always but it was just a struggling kiss of assurance to ensure me that everything will turn out just fine.
“I need you and our baby needs you too”. The strong muscle contraction of my stomach left me with pain; however, Trev’s mortality was more unbearable and I could not help to lose him again. Not to mortality and not to cancer. My eyes betrayed me and my face was flushed red due to my body heat. Tears streamed down my hot cheeks and I melted and I surrendered. It was an unbeatable force. "Hushh...don't cry." His thin fingers wiped away the betraying tears. He pretended to be strong. I knew deep down he was as sad as I was. The torment will soon diminish.
Every movement appeared to drain his energy and convulsively endeavoured his frail body. It was like an unseen leech. However, that did not obstruct him from casting smile on his lips. “Trev...,” I crooned. He understood and let me touch his face willingly. I love him ever since our eyes first met each other. It was his green emerald eyes captivated me. My fingers carefully traced his unshaven face. He was so thin and his eyes were tired. He closed his eyes when my fingers met his brows. His strong jaw dropped slowly. He was enjoying the excruciating pain and I pecked his cheek tenderly to say that I will always love him.
“Live your life...carpe diem...and be safe...” his voice trailed.
His right hand searched for my left hand. He faced my palm outwards and made an invisible line on my life line. He once told me that I would live longer because of my life line. He coughed and blood smeared my palm. It was uncontrollable and he coughed again and this time I can feel his body was struggling to conceal his weaknesses. He chuckled when he saw my furrowed brow. His trembling fingers once again traced the life line and with one long breath; his eyes closed forever.
“Goodbye Trev...,” and I kissed him hard on the forehead for the last time.
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