Home Alone...another reflection (Come Clean)

In less than one month, I’ll be going to the UK (listen, it’s no longer local Ulu Kinta)!!!! Yay!!! The feeling is so indescribable especially having to give a second thought upon looking my preparation. Sweet and totally euphoric!!! And the sweetness is so intangible that it overflows back from my mouth...what a wonder. Hurmmm? Owh yes! I’m mentally blocked because I’m still soul searching a.k.a. experiencing a detrimental state of excessive sleeping. I think it has somehow affected my biological clock since I tend to sleep late and wake up late! It’s such an embarrassment! What a loathsome creature I am.

Introducing, my newest buddy, Sony DSC - TX5. My very own camera that's water-proof, shock-proof, weather-proof and dust-proof. It’s so awesome because it comes with multiple modes including the twilight mode that enables me to take photos in the dark. No flash required. Hence, I’ll look great in night photos amidst the shining clusters of stars!

Physically I’m not ready and don’t let me start grumbling over my mental and spiritual preparation. It’s such an abomination! Giving it a second thought, probably about 70 % of my peers are experiencing the same insane hiatus syndrome of laziness and extra drowsiness.

My rueful den. I don't know what's lurking in between the mess. I think I saw few cockroaches brooding when I was back from my one week camp. Gross...I mean...what a love from nature

  

There has been too much planning, too many castles have been built up in the cloud up until one point that they have accumulated most of my thoughts daily. I’m brain-dead. Highlighting the pre-departure event, all in all, I don’t think my preparation is sufficient. Somehow, when I was caught in deep slumber...oppsss deep thoughts, my mind will be found missing and drifting into a deep blue ocean, thinking what would happen to me the next three years? Will I be the same person? Or will I transform into a complete stranger – the ideal Muslimah that I’ve been dreaming and highly hoping all this while? Time to think because the clock is ticking. I’m turning into a hermit again. This time, it's a bald nun... =P

Drooling =Q____. Pardon me. The smell of my mum’s cooking always causes my stomach to growl (this post was supposed to be published yesterday’s evening. Everything went crazy, madness to be précised when my limited bandwidth finally reached its limit. This resulted in the delay of such important post, am I right. Well, just give a nod and I’ll shut up). Don’t laugh I dare you; if you’re in my shoes (give me the secret code. Guess my shoes size), you’ll definitely end up like me, considering only one month going before the big day. 

My first successful dish. as a matter of factly, I did everything by myself.

Continue --- =_=” (scribbling, scribbling) ahhh where was I?

Let’s try to loosen up our muscle and just be limber.

Those curry-puffs were made by me, including the stuffing. They're edible =))

I'll miss the makis and California rolls by Jusco

How fast the time is marching and my four months holiday almost reaching its pinnacle. Time is tide and it’s still moving. And I’m still wasting my time pondering and day-dreaming. Yipess!!! Owh well, Eid always be the most important day in my calendar (because I love the food! Scrumptious, crunchy and all types of Eid cookies. Not to mention the customary “duit raya”). Sigh.

Am I ready? Are you?

My gargantuan skycab (I'm just making it up). I think 25 % of the bag will be occupied by my "almost" mini rice cooker...what a bummer

This lifetime journey is not only about gallivanting with my loved ones. This lifetime journey is not only about doing things that I can’t do when my family is around (surely I would like to do something). This lifetime journey is not an opportunity to put aside my modesty and indulge in my obsession. “Then what? Why should I even give a damn if I can’t do what I want to do? Why should I even bother to read this rubbish? Religious cult moron!”. I'm not fooling anyone. Let's be rational, shall we?

Let’s turn over a new leaf and start anew with a more proper life. The Islamic way. After all, Islam is the way of life. Noted! Let’s just give it a try. Who knows it’ll be much fun and it’s exactly what you’ve been seeking your whole entire life? You have nothing to lose. In fact, there’s no string attached. How cool is that? Being abroad is one of the best opportunities to wholly practise Islam. You have to have the sense of proud of being a Muslim or izzah in Arabic. I mean it.

Just look at our surrounding (enough within your house vicinity, only 5 metres radius from your house), most Malaysians are born Muslims. You’ll automatically be named as a Muslim. However, when you’re somewhere else like say...the US, Islam is something new to everyone (apart from the Gulf people). In Malaysia, you wear hijab but you fail to delve in the significance of hijab. You pray 5 times a day but you fail to notice how important are the submission to our one God, Allah. You hardly practise dzikr or most importantly you seldom touch and even learn the meaning behind all the Arabic letterings of Koran. All because you’re born Muslim. Consequently, you fail to experience and taste the sweetness of iman (faith). It’s like as if you don’t have the thirst to discover Islam, am I right? Whilst, if you’re a newly converted, you’ll find it very intriguing to learn more about Islam.

How to taste the sweetness of iman? Lo! It’s easier said than doing. I can only provide you with suggestions but you need to practise what you’re preached. There are many things that you can do. Some are even as simple as calling out loud 1,2,3... But the best option is to love Allah. There’s no need to sacrifice anything. You just need to prove your devotion to Him, by submitting yourself to Him. Again, how? Remember the 5 pillars of Islam and remember the 6 pillars of iman? Those are the examples of clear guidance to love Allah. You’ll win a lot if you invest in this scheme. Tell you what. The greatest give of life is mahabatullah (love to Allah). The truest divine love. You’ll soon see how the love towards Allah is the ultimate and totally different from the love towards mere humans. Let’s develop our love towards Allah =)).

My addiction towards fictional novels resulting in more towers of papers.

“Why do I need to care?”. My friend, it’s important for us to acknowledge and realise that we’re the chosen one, who’ll represent Malaysia and most importantly Islam. You’re going for a battle and you’re holding a very big placard or a banner carved with big letterings, “I’m a Muslim”. Wouldn’t it be humiliating if someone asks you about Islam and you fail to justify your answer? You can’t even defend your own religion, your dignity. Name it, maybe they ask you why Muslim women are asked to wear hijab. It turns out, you only justify most of the common believes that hijab is a form of female oppression. If that’s not enough, some brilliant others might ask you about female circumcision in Islam. Do you know about this? And you say no and you fall into their outrageous believes that female circumcision in Islam is another example of mutilation. Kudos to you.

My friend, there’s no need to feel offended or slightly feeling of throwing bananas at me. I’m just trying to put forward all the possibilities if we’re not prepared when we’re in the foreign land. There’s no one to look after you. Not me. The truth is, if you put Islam as priority. you’ll eventually notice and know that Allah sees and hears everything. Do you know that? Admit it. I’m scared that if and anyhow anyone or I mean any of us will go astray and turn to despicable and immoral activities. There’re many possibilities and circumstances whereby we’ll be too carried away by these nuisances. Yes, you’re strong and yes you’re intelligent but our ability is limited. True maybe today you can still uphold your iman. How about tomorrow? The day after? And the coming days? We’re growing older. It feels like almost yesterday when I first enrolled as a standard one student and now, I’ve already turned 20 (I’m old!!! Sob sob). “We still have time to repent.” Yes, if that’s what you believe. Time won’t stop ticking remember that. May Allah protect us. I’m scared my friend. How many youngsters as young as my brother have turned into wild animals, setting religion as their last option and indulge in unhealthy activities. They fail to distinguish between the rights and the wrongs. How could this thing occur?

“It’s a symbol of the civilised new world.” Turn 30 years before, turn 20 years before. What was Malaysia? I just can’t understand why most women would rather be fashion victims instead of leading to more peaceful life? “It is fun, dimwit!” if that fun only results in Allah’s wrath, I’ll rather surrender myself to Allah. Tears pelt on my cheeks when the five days prayers are being ignored and you can’t even force yourself to perform them punctually. In contrast, you can’t even wait if there’s a delay for the movies you’re watching on the blank screen of the cinemas. It’s true isn’t it? Why, my friend. Ask your heart. Don’t deny it. It’s the reality.

Hey, hey friends!!! One of my best friends gave me this for my 20th birthday

How weak we are if we’re to compare to the previous Muslims. Aren’t you ashamed of yourself (I’m actually pointing to myself because I do the same thing too. Jaw-dropped)? You cry because one of the heroes or the heroines on the TV is being brutally murdered or maybe listening to heartbreaking news of the breaking up of a famous superstar couples. However, will you shed blood tears for atonement and seek refuge for Allah’s forgiveness? I give a very simple example. Will your heart ache when the story of Prophet Muhammad is being told or maybe someone making fun and even making false accusation of Salahuddin Al-Ayubi? “Who’s that fella?”. My friend, he’s one of the most famous people in the whole world that ought to be respected instead of blonde sex-bombs or retarded psychopaths. The westerners had known him as Saladin. A great philanthropist; he was the great leader who was able to return Jerusalem to Islam. Are you as strong as he was? Ask yourself. Read and study about him.

Mum, I just washed my iPod. Seriously, I can't stop myself from crying during the month of Ramadhan because I love my iPod so much. And it's my first iPod!

It bores me to bone when I listen to some of the chatters about lovey-dovey stuff that’s so offensive (some are titillating and even defeats the meaning of “lovers” yukksss). Quit it, will you! I’m not disgusted nor that am I interested. I’m speechless. Why? Should I write everything down? Maybe I shouldn’t. You’ll despise me even more and even may label me as a bothersome. I take that. I’ll swallow that as long as you’ll give few minutes and wonder the truths behind my words. I love you my friends! My hope is that we could share the same dream and revive the missing Islamic spirit.

I’m brain-drained again...


Pardon me if I'm lacken or slacken or this post appears sickening. And hopefully you guys will enjoy the new photos that're more sleek. The shutter won't stop clicking ever since I got the camera last Saturday. Cheeze!!! Click!!!